Okay, Now it's Time to Panic

The current dread being felt by many in this country has effected me very little. I haven't been fired recently, I don't own a house so the threat of foreclosure's not real, and I don't own stock so I could care less what the Market does.

However, I now feel complete panic. The threat has never been as real as it is now. I see everything I've lived for crashing down. I wasn't able to sleep at all after getting the news Saturday. I have just gotten back from the bank, where I withdrew all 23 dollars and 14 cents I have. I am now gearing up to run off into the woods, where I will wait this out in a hollowed out tree with a clan of gnomes.

What news did I receive that is causing such panic? Limp Bizkit has reunited. They claim they are "more disgusted and bored with the state of heavy popular music than we were with each other." Well what about how much we are disgusted by you guys? Music can't get more disgusting than Limp Bizkit. When I was in college, I had a roommate that loved this trash. I'd come home from class to the wonderful sounds of that nookie song, and I don't think I can take another round of this. I'm writing to congress to ask them to bar this from happening. These are dark days indeed.